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I’m Talking About It Right Now

Hello WORLD.

Today is the day that I could take a snap in the afternoon, go hanging out with my friends and be relax for some hours. Yeah, I had hard times last week, it was a test week. Well, it was a very very very tired week. I couldn’t even take it as a joke. I mean, it is a big different from junior high school to senior high school. Sometimes I think that I can’t face it alone, I need someone who supports me.

#I think I start talking about my feelings.

When you know you let yourself down, what you gonna do? Do you just avoid it all away? Or you get the point of it? Or you don’t take it so serious? Or you go moving on and go take your dreams in?

I don’t know, I think I have a conflict between my brain and my heart. And, I don’t know what is getting wrong with me. It is not just about adaptation in my high school, it is all about me; my feelings and my future. People often said to me that I am strong and nice. But, I don’t think I am. There’s something in my heart says that I should feel deeper what I want to do. Well, the point is I’m getting confuse of myself. I’m just……….speechless

#Back to the point

By the way, I miss my junior high school times. It was an adventurous memories. I miss that I was speaking English everyday, it’s like I’m getting easier to speak English. I know it was a regular thing to do, but I wanted to be expert at English. I want it and will always want it. I remember that I searched friends for my English project in and I found it, she is from Japan. I had a good time with her (Japanese girl) and my friends. We’re exchange the informations about the cultures in Indonesia nor in Japan by e-mails. I’ll show you my Japanese friend, Chiharu.

Here she is. I forget which one she is, because this English project was on months ago. 😛

Yeah, it was good for practicing my English. Do you know why am I always saying everything about English or things that related to foreign countries? Because that’s my dream! I am an expert dreamer and my dreams is too many to be counted. One of my biggest dream is becoming a professional journalist and writer and live in England. I want to make some arts by writing. I want to make people proud of me. I want to make people see me as a person who can effect the world by my work.

I am young! So, I can do it. I can make my dreams come true someday. Do little positive things first and then I can go moving on over and over again and focus on all of what I dream about right now. I’m going through all this challenges and end up with a happiness, amin. 🙂

I think this session I’m talking about motivations for myself. -_- But you can take my motivations to be your motivations *if you want it*. 😀




My Life is Getting Harder

“Walking on your mind was exhausted. Never mind never thought you were hiding it. Seeing you’re gone is the easiest part. But forgetting you is the hardest part. I’ve tried to find my way on you. But I couldn’t find my joy. Broken promises, broken physically. Think patiently, go wisely and do bravely. Those words are good. But I know you will never good for ever. Now you know I know that you lied and I’m tired. Say goodbye to you, yes I can. Probably next year you may come back.”


Those words are just words that came out of my mind and it isn’t really connected with my point of why-am-I-writing-this-post, haha. Okay, tomorrow I’m going to have a week of mid-test. Well, I’ve studied already but maybe later I’ll study again (of course, I won’t get bad scores). Well, you guys know that I’m a senior high school student. And…..they say that high school’s time is the best time they ever had but, I will disagree with that because I feel, from the first I became a senior high school student, that every single day I got homework. Yes, homework! A lot of homework and test. I’m not going to say this but, it makes me tired. I don’t know if I could handle this for the next time but as you know, I’m alive now. Yet, I’m still thinking about my weight is gaining. Yeah, I know, girls’ problems. But, it doesn’t matter, haha. I think my days of school are quite boring but there are some days that I feel those days are amazing.

So, I guess I will continue my life as people try what they can do the best and surely I’m going to keep my head up for my dreams and make it come true ’cause I know someday people will see me as a person who could light up the world.



He’s Different, Good Different

Salam. Good evening!

Hi, this is just a minute, okay I have no time to write this post for an hour because homework is waiting for me.

Firstly, minal aidzin wal faidzin, Happy Eid 1432 H, I know, I know…, it’s too late to say this, but does it matter? Haha.

Secondly, I had my Eid Mubarak holiday in Semarang on 1st of September until 4th of September 2011. I was excited because I had to meet someone, maybe someone special for me. He’s my brother.

To the point, he was terrible and horrible brother at first. Then, suddenly (Maybe God gives him hidayah) he took a Constabulary Academic (Akademik Kepolisian). And every single thing from him started changing. I couldn’t even believe at first either because he was just so naughty in his whole life. But, time answers it, I can see from his eyes that he has a potential to be succeed, he has ambition, he loves his family, he’s becoming a good person. Alhamdulillah, my family and I are so happy to see him like he’s now. The new him.

I met him in Semarang and I went home on Saturday. It was just sad, I miss him everyday because he is the only who makes me want to cry and fight with him. Yeah, brother. Now, he’s just him, he shows his ambition clearly. Glad to know that. 🙂

Goodluck my brother!

I know he can. I know he’s strong.


Break Fast With X-J 2’14

Yesterday, I had a program at my school. It’s Ramadhan, so the program was about Islam. I joined ‘Manasik’ of Hajj until the time all of us had to break our fast. We ate a dessert called Sop Buah. Then, we went pray Maghrib and this was the moment, we ate our special menu together, Hoka Hoka Bento. All of the tenth grade students gathered in a big room called GSG (Gor Serba Guna). After we were eating, we took some pictures then went pray Taraweh. Then………., we’re going home. So, that’s it. I think the best moment is when we took some pictures. I have some of them from my friend, Rosella. Check them out!

High school is the best. I start to feel how important friends are. Even best friends. I can feel it right now. 🙂


We are Paramore!


Sooo guys I have news. It’s amazing news. I watched Paramore’s concert! Yeay, can’t believe I was watching that concert, finally I could watch it, live at Ancol, Jakarta on 19th of August 2011. *BIG relief*

It’s hard to explain, but I enjoyed the concert, it was just Ah-Mae-zeng, haha. I watched the concert with my cousin, maybe she’s already becoming my soulmate, and my dad’s driver. I met my friend, Desi, when the concert were finished.

Ok. So the concert is you know, I already explain it. The Hayley Williams looked so beautiful, rock and roll, stunning and she was just so cool. She sang about fifteen songs on Paramore albums. Before Paramore, there was a band for the opening named The Swellers. Then, Paramore started the concert with “Ignorance” and finishing the concert with “Misery Bussiness” There were so many songs I can’t remember the lyrics even I didn’t know some songs, pretty bad. But, as you know, I had a BIG enjoy there. Well, now, I’m officially becoming a Parawhores, Paramore fans. 


Poem: Aku Takut

Aku takut setiap nafas yang kuhembus adalah dosa.

Aku takut setiap gerak-gerikku adalah hina.

Aku takut setiap kebaikan yang kuberi adalah kesalahan.

Aku takut kesenangan yang aku lalui adalah cobaan.

Aku takut ilmu ini bernilai tikus.

Aku takut pulpen ini bertinta darah saudaraku sendiri.

Aku takut setiap manusia adalah setan.

Aku takut setiap rumah adalah korupsi.

Aku takut setiap sel tubuhku adalah kotoran sapi.

Aku takut amarah mereka adalah hikmah.

Aku takut akhir dari semua ini adalah neraka.


Piano Has Been Changing My Life


Actually, it doesn’t. Why should I publish this post if it was a private thing? Okay, just……….keep reading.

Nowadays, many teenagers have their own talent. They’re good at everything, especially about music. I like it when they can sing beautifully, or maybe, play guitar well and many more. I want to be like them, pretty smart in music.

Honestly, I can play piano. I’ve been playing that awesome instrument when I was ten, but I can’t play piano fluently, pretty bad, right?

So, it’s just the way piano is. I love piano because every single moment I hear the sound of piano, it feels so wow and from the time, I’m trying to play piano. Although I have a trouble in me, a laziness, I want to work harder just to be good at playing piano.

photo souce: google.